Wanting contact...
Many years ago, during one of my many attempts at college and university (6!), I was on a small team of students making a documentary of our choice. We were two outsider-liberals, and one communist, so naturally we decided on homelessness as a topic.

We wandered the city, went to shelters, and even went to one of the "jungles" (those places along 1-5 where there are whole encampments of people deep in the bushes and trees, hidden from most people's gaze.

One of the things I discovered on that journey was that the homeless and the street people are (surprise!) human beings. They've got kids and parents and siblings. They mostly didn't sign up for this, and we couldn't find one person who tried to shift the responsibility for their "plight" to some outside force. It was good for me to be able to stop seeing them as "other."

One of the things several people talked about (and I've heard this from other since) is their feeling of being invisible. People won't look at them, they avoid contact, and some of these folks can go a whole day without meaningful interaction with another human being.

So, I decided early on that I could do one thing at least. I could acknowledge the presence of everyone I encountered. I could look people in the eye, nod, or smile.

Initially I was nervous, because I thought that this acknowledgment would be seen as an invitation to more interaction than I was comfortable with. The panhandlers would not let me go, or the crazies would latch on to me. I might even get assaulted because someone might see my gaze as a threat.

I learned quickly, though, that it was very easy to give the look/nod/smile in a way that didn't invite interaction, but just said, "I see you, I acknowledge you, and I respect you." Only rarely does someone see that as an open door to come closer. If it's a panhandler, I smile, shake my head, and say, "I'm sorry, no," and I walk on. I have never had a problem with that. It's firm but not rude, and most everyone gets it.

For me, I think it's a matter of showing respect, and not showing fear or nervousness. It's both nice and it's safe. (Three different times I have diffused potential muggings or beatings by that direct look with a smile, as if I didn't know what was going on, but also showing I wasn't afraid.)

I firmly believe that I am safer because I don't move through the world in fear, and I also believe that I have been able to impact the lives of many people in at least a small way by showing that respect.

Clearly this way isn't for everyone, but if you have the inclination, I urge you to give it a try. The freedom is wonderful!